Everything new on Netflix, Disney+, Paramount+, Apple TV+, Amazon Prime, Hulu and Peacock.
Premieres Wednesday:
Bank Robbers: The Last Great Heist — This week's big true-crime doc tells the story of a bunch of thieves who stole millions from a Buenos Aires bank and got away, slipping past 200 police officers who were gathered outside. The key to their plan was convincing the cops the place was an elementary school. (Netflix)
Heartsong — A traveling violinist gets himself into a world of trouble when he falls for the bride at a wedding he's been hired to play. Gosh, most musicians I know would be happy just to get some of the buffet. (Netflix)
I Am Groot — Five new animated shorts show Baby Groot experiencing childhood's customary rites of passage, including learning to draw and taking a bath. Ask any animator: If you learn to draw, you'll absolutely take a bath. (Disney+)
Indian Matchmaking — Mumbai relationship expert Sima Taparia returns for a second season of helping lonely hearts find their soulmates. Eight new episodes of hookahs and hookups, comin' right at ya. (Netflix)
Instant Dream Home — Master renovators have just 24 hours to make an ordinary domicile into something truly special. And I'm supposed to be impressed by this? I can turn any decent dwelling into a pig sty in six! (Netflix)
Premieres Thursday:
The Box — In a three-part docuseries, Detective Chris Loudon is motivated to crack a serial-murder case after he discovers photographs of a bunch of young women in an evidence box that's gone untouched for half a century. See, now that's exactly what my house is like. (Paramount+)
Dota: Dragon's Blood — Book 2 of the dragon-and-demon-happy videogame adaptation ended with a whole bunch of subterfuges revealed and characters killed off. But there's plenty left to resolve in this third go-'round, like the pressing question of who gets to rule the moon. (My guess is that it depends on whether they allow ballot harvesting.) (Netflix)
Stay on Board: The Leo Baker Story — Learn the story of the champion skateboarder who withdrew from the 2020 Olympics to pursue life as transgender and nonbinary. It's kind of sad when you realize that 25 years ago, the skating was the part you had to reassure the world wasn't a crime. (Netflix)
Trolls: TrollsTopia — The show's seventh and final season includes appearances by such fanciful creatures as "glampires" (fabulous vampires), "rock-coons" (hardcore raccoons) and "Orlando Sentinel Top Fans" (the worst kind of trolls there are, anywhere). (Hulu and Peacock)
Premieres Friday:
13 the Musical — The Broadway hit that gave the world Ariana Grande yields a long-awaited film adaptation, with newcomer Khiyla Aynne stepping into the role Grande once occupied. Might as well be proactive about your newfound fame, Khiyla: File that restraining order against Pete Davidson now. (Netflix)
Day Shift — Jamie Foxx plays a hard-working dad whose job as a pool cleaner is a cover for his real gig: hunting vampires. Snoop Dogg appears as a fellow slayer who tries to get Foxx's character union benefits. That isn't a joke, by the way, but an actual plot point in the movie. I always appreciate it when the people who make these things give me a nice paragraph's vacation. (Netflix)
Five Days at Memorial — This reality-based miniseries about the effects of Hurricane Katrina on a New Orleans hospital was originally pitched as a season of Ryan Murphy's American Crime Story. Instead, Murphy went with an adaptation of the Clinton/Lewinsky impeachment scandal. I guess he felt Hurricane Katrina just hadn't blown hard enough. (Sorry everybody, I'm always a little rusty when I come back from vacation.) (Apple TV+)
A League of Their Own — The beloved Penny Marshall movie about the early days of women's baseball becomes a series that's going to explore a bunch of issues only hinted at in the original, including gender identity and race. While promoting the show, real-life Rockford Peach Maybelle Blair did her part by coming out as a lesbian at age 95. Personally, I'm going to have to wait a few more years to decide if she's sincere or if it's just a phase. (Amazon Prime)
Lucy's School — In the latest "Peanuts" special, the headstrong Miss Van Pelt starts her own elementary school, only to find out it's a lot more work than she had envisioned. I don't know, Roosevelt Franklin seemed to manage just fine. Maybe if she weren't such a f***ing Karen? (Apple TV+)
A Model Family — Streaming's fascination with all things South Korean continues with a drama series about a humble college professor who gets tangled up in the drug trade to provide for his family. A little Breaking Bad, a little Ozark ... somebody explain to me why it's China we're going to war with over knockoffs. (Netflix)
Never Have I Ever Season 3 — How long can Mindy Kaling continue to depict her adolescence as an awkward and painful process of having to choose between multiple cute guys until we have absolutely no sympathy for her whatsoever? Well, there's another season coming after this one, and she swears that'll be the end. Good call. She needs to get to the B.J. Novak years while she's still young enough to remember them. (Netflix)
Secret Headquarters — High-octane family fun ensues when a kid discovers the crime-fighting nerve center his dad (Owen Wilson) has built under their home. Of course, what he really would have preferred to find is porn. (Paramount+)
This Fool — Stand-up comic Chris Estrada adapts his life and work into a sitcom about a juvie rehabilitation worker whose own cousin is a gangbanger fresh out of prison. On the plus side, he always knows where to go when he wants to bring a shiv to Show and Tell. (Hulu)
Premieres Monday:
Deepa & Anoop — Preschool viewers get some new role models in the form of an Indian girl and her pet elephant. Sima Taparia says they're perfect for each other, but she'll wait until they're an appropriate age to draw up the marriage contract. (Netflix)
Premieres Tuesday:
Untold — The unconventional sports documentary series returns with four new episodes. In the first, The Girlfriend Who Didn't Exist, we learn how linebacker Manti Te'o was catfished into thinking not only that he had a girlfriend, but that she had died of leukemia. Come back next week for a hard-hitting exposé of America's mathletes, The Girlfriend Who Lives in Canada. (Netflix)
