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We know there are probably a million ways to kick the bucket in the Sunshine State. But since Florida is the land where just about everything is trying to kill you, we decided to just highlight 100.
Click the captions on each slide for the backstory.
You could drive around with a missile in your car
Photo via Palm Beach PostYou could walk out onto a log and discover it’s actually an alligator.
Photo via Photo by Richard Jones via WFTVYou could crash your semi-truck, spilling thousands of Bud Lights on the highway, because you were petting your dog.
Photo via WFTSYou could choose to have your motorcycle towed with a chain.
Photo via ImgurYou could be in a car accident because the woman driving next to you was shaving her bikini line.
Photo via YouTubeYou could attempt to run from Florida to Cuba in a inflatable hamster ball.
Photo via CNNA woman named Crystal Metheney could fire a missile into your car.
Photo via DeathAndTaxes.comYou could die of leprosy from petting an armadillo.
Photo via Orlando WeeklyYou could go swimming at the beach and die of flesh-eating bacteria.
Photo via Orlando WeeklyYou could be hanging out in Jacksonville and find yourself stuck in a vending machine.
Photo via FOXYou could be obsessed with kissing alligators.
Photo via Sun SentinelYou could be adopted by Gov. Rick Scott for his 2010 campaign, and then returned to the shelter after he wins.
Photo via 96 K RockYou could get mauled by a bath salt zombie.
Photo via Daily BeastYou could get really confused and lock yourself in a closet that unlocks from the inside.
Photo via WeshYou could go for a hike and get shot by one of the 2000 Florida bear hunters, including Ted Nugent.
Photo via ArcheryTalkBlogYour uncle could set your house on fire because you didn’t take him on a beer run.
Photo via Instagram user psychawticYou could get swallowed by a massive sinkhole.
Photo via Orlando WeeklyYou could be the unfortunate one who finds the Orlando Cobra.
Photo via Orlando WeeklyYou could get lost scuba diving in Devil’s Spring, or any other Florida underground cavern.
Photo via divebuddy.comYou could get meningitis from a giant snail.
Photo via Orlando WeeklyYou could die of exposure because your stuck at the top of a drawbridge in your birthday suit.
Photo via Huffington PostLiterally anything can crawl out of a toilet.
Photo via Orlando WeeklyGeorge Zimmerman
Photo via HuffingtonPostYou could dial 911 only to have the dispatcher ignore your call so he could finish eating his pizza.
Photo via Raw StoryYou could get stuck in the Orlando Eye for days and days, eventually dying of extreme boredom.
Photo via Orlando WeeklyYou could be hit by a flying shark on I-95.
Photo via Orlando WeeklyYou could get decapitated on Space Mountain.
Photo via DisneyYou could park in someone’s spot at Publix and get beat up by an angry husband.
Photo via Orlando WeeklyYou could have a stroke on the Tower of Terror.
Photo via WikipediaFlorida leads the country in death by lightning, so you could go out with a bang.
Photo via Instagram user acaciocordioliYou could find 50 kilos of cocaine and be hunted by a drug cartel.
Photo via NBC 2You could die after a vigorous round of dwarf tossing, which was banned in Florida in 1989.
Photo via Instagram user surruh_fergYou could be ordering a calzone and then forced to fight off a samurai sword-wielding attacker.
Photo via Orlando WeeklyYour own dog could run you over with an F-150.
Photo via Instagram user xoxoroxydogYou could get in a car crash while filming yourself with a selfie stick.
Photo via YouTubeYou could take a shotgun to the face for dating the stepdaughter of this guy.
Photo via Click OrlandoYou could attempt to pet a 400 pound black bear in Dade County.
Photo via USA TodayYou could die by being folded into a couch.
Photo via Instagram user jennashaffYou could be attacked by a shark at New Smyrna Beach, which has the highest rate of shark attacks in the world.
Photo via YouTubeYou could overdose after a visit to Unique Health Care, Orlando’s premier pill mill.
Photo via TwitterYou could die from refusing your knife-happy daughter some potato salad.
Photo via Instagram user odettealabamaIf you ride a bike, you’re screwed. Florida is ranked as the most dangerous state for peddlers.
Photo via Gallery HipYou could die trying to sneak back into your girlfriend’s house through the cat door.
Photo via Instagram user allyorkandnoplayYou could accidentally aim your gun at your testicles while cleaning the weapon.
Photo via Facebook.You could for a swim and get Naegleria fowleri, the brain-eating amoeba.
Photo via CDCYou could be corned by a 350 pound pig.
Photo via KNOEYou could die if the Boogeyman makes your motorcycle crash.
Photo via Instagram user alekseev.ilyaYou could get in a jetski accident with an astronaut.
Photo via Instagram user lacey_lou17You could be attacked for having too many items in the express checkout.
Photo via ForbesYou could get crushed in a trash compactor while trying to escape prison.
Photo via Instagram user tommorganradioYou could get electrocuted by a faulty pump in a minigolf pond.
Photo via Instagram user ezbypassYou’re more likely to be hit by a car in Orlando than anywhere else in America.
Photo via Instagram user baileybug1223You could be repeatedly stung by an army of red imported fire ants.
Photo via CDCYou could eat a raw oyster and get Vibrio.
Photo via Huffington PostYou could die car-surfing while on meth.
Photo via WPBFYou could be walking in front of a train while texting.
Photo via Instagram user mscarolmHere in Florida, there’s a good chance a hurricane, tornado, flood or wildfire will take you out.
Photo via Core LogicYou could be sitting in a recliner when a water buffalo head falls and crushes you.
Photo via Instagram user carlyboiillYou could go to prison in Florida, which has had 346 deaths occur behind bars in 2014.
Photo via NPRYou could die trying to huff Freon.
Photo via Instagram user primetimecoolingYou get knocked out by a jumping sturgeon.
Photo via Orlando WeeklyYou could head-butt a bus because you think the fare is too expensive .
Photo via Miami New TimesYou could get stuck in a grease trap while breaking into a store.
Photo via WeshYou could die of HIV, the most distinctive common cause of death in Florida outside of the top 10 causes of death in America.
Photo via NIAID, NIH.You could swim 4 miles through alligator-infested-waters because it’s on your bucket list.
Photo via News 13You could die after someone fires a shot into the air, and a wayward bullet falls on your skull.
Photo via Miami New TimesYou could die after making a dumb blonde joke to your girlfriend who then bites your nipple and tries to stab you in your sleep.
Photo via Instagram user sir.awesome.boiiiYou could find yourself in this woman’s home, which was filled with over 3700 blades.
Photo via Fox 13 NewsYou could see this thing outside your front door.
Photo via CNN Credit: CNNYou could be sunburned to death. Hey, it’s possible.
Photo via Orlando Weekly.You could tell your son to get a job, who then decides to stab you.
Photo via Instagram user kaylerz35You could get bit by a mosquito and get West Nile virus.
Photo via CDCYou could die if your girlfriend tries to stab you after you refuse to have sex with her.
Photo via SlothedYou could be at K-Mart when someone decides to set some lingerie on fire.
Photo via Flickr.You could have a crazy owl terrorizing your neighborhood.
Photo via Instagram user morrismoooYou could be stuck in a traffic jam on I-4 and die of rage.
Photo via WikipediaYou could give your girlfriend’s kids lice, and then she hires a hitman to kill you.
Photo via Instagram user thehairangelsYou could have a son who beats you up for feeding his cat.
Photo via Instagram user adriennenvyYou could get in a car accident with a woman who just tweeted “2 drunk 2 care.”
Photo via PeopleYour meth lab could explode and disfigure your face.
Photo via Instagram multifandomshitYou could be at a water gun fight and someone decides to bring a real gun.
Photo via Stream Machine StoreYou could die when the Red Bull B-Boy champion serves you into oblivion. Death by serve.
Photo via YouTube.You could be beaten to death over an Xbox.
Photo via CBS NewsYou could be get bit by an Eastern coral snake, or one of the many poisonous snakes that call Florida home.
Photo via Instagram user herpjesusYou could get pummeled by a water spout and die in a watery plume of terror.
Photo via Instagram user 305ssomYou could go swimming in the Wekiva River and a gator could rip off your arm.
Photo via Mirror OnlineYou could die of a heatstroke while wearing a disgustingly sweaty Disney cast member costume.
Photo via Orlando WeeklyYou could get attacked by a cop for not rolling your window down all the way.
Photo via Live LeakYou could die eating too many cockroaches.
Photo via US NewsYou could get Ciguatera poisoning from eating a fish.
Photo via whoi.eduYou could get an infection after your neighbor smears poop on you.
Photo via Daily MailYou could be attacked by a gang of angry hawks.
Photo via YouTubeA Florida teen could spike your Diet Coke with hand sanitizer.
Photo via medicaldaily.comIf you’re a senior citizen, you should be extra cautious. Florida leads the nation in elderly deaths beind the wheel.
Photo via Huffington PostYou could be involved in a road rage incident on the 1-4 over a Confederate flag.
Photo via Photo via Facebook/Phillip ArroyoYou could run into a man named Rhino, who may or may not have a rocket launcher.
Photo via EtsyYou could be attacked by a woman wielding a dildo.
Photo via LongBeachStuff.comGet be attacked by an angry raccoon and get rabies.
Photo via CDCYou could be attacked with bleach while walking out of a Publix.
Photo via FacebookYou could go golfing.
Photo via ABC