SEMIAUTOMATIC FOR THE PEOPLE
Lord of War Studio: Lions Gate Films Rated: R Website: http://lordofwarthemovie.com/ Release Date: 2005-09-16 Cast: Nicolas Cage, Jared Leto, Bridget Moynahan, Ian Holm, Eamonn Walker Director: Andrew Niccol Screenwriter: Andrew Niccol Music Score: Antonio Pinto WorkNameSort: Lord of War Our Rating: 4.00 Nicolas Cage as a globe-trotting, under-the-counter arms dealer? It works better than anyone…
CRAZY RIGHT NOW
Asylum Studio: Paramount Classics Rated: R Website: http://www.paramountclassics.com/asylum/ Release Date: 2005-09-16 Cast: Natasha Richardson, Marton Csokas, Ian McKellen, Hugh Bonneville, Joss Ackland Director: David MacKenzie Screenwriter: Patrick Marber Music Score: Mark Mancina WorkNameSort: Asylum Our Rating: 1.00 Despite its febrile themes of murder, suicide and violent psychosis – and the presence of an oft-nude Natasha…
Just Like Heaven
Just Like Heaven Studio: DreamWorks SKG Rated: PG-13 Website: http://www.justlikeheaven-themovie.com/ Release Date: 2005-09-16 Cast: Reese Witherspoon, Mark Ruffalo, Donal Logue, Dina Waters, Ben Shenkman Director: Mark S. Waters Screenwriter: Peter Tolan, Leslie Dixon WorkNameSort: Just Like Heaven Our Rating: 1.00 On the basis of the ad campaign, one might expect nothing worse than a gender-reversed…
The Exorcism of Emily Rose
The Exorcism of Emily Rose Studio: Screen Gems Rated: PG-13 Website: http://www.sonypictures.com/movies/theexorcismofemilyrose/index.html Release Date: 2005-09-09 Cast: Laura Linney, Tom Wilkinson, Campbell Scott, Colm Feore, Jennifer Carpenter Director: Scott Derrickson Screenwriter: Scott Derrickson, Paul Harris Boardman WorkNameSort: Exorcism of Emily Rose, The Genre fans spend entire years waiting for a horror flick that can attract top-shelf…
The Man
The Man Studio: New Line Cinema Rated: PG-13 Website: www.themanmovie.com/ Release Date: 2005-09-09 Cast: Samuel L. Jackson, Eugene Levy, Anthony Mackie, Luke Goss, Miguel Ferrer Director: Les Mayfield Screenwriter: Jim Piddock, Margaret Oberman, Steve Carpenter WorkNameSort: Man, The It’s a closely guarded secret, but big-time filmmaking is all about reusing existing resources. Think of all…
ITALIAN GETAWAY
I somehow managed to talk my husband, the Impatient Gourmet, into heading to Mount Dora for lunch on a lazy Sunday afternoon. We slowly made our way north on Orange Blossom Trail until we reached the quaint roads that drag one into the heart of this historical town in Lake County. Our destination was Café…
ELECTRIC SHOCK
The Cellar Door Sessions 1970 Label: Columbia/Legacy Rated: NONE WorkNameSort: Cellar Door Sessions 1970, The Although Bitches Brew gets the bulk of the credit for launching Miles Davis into the psychedelic stratosphere, that 1969 album, however groundbreaking, was a walk in a quiet park compared to the electric violence that thundered out of speakers when…
BRIGHT WIRES
Progressions: 100 Years of Jazz Guitar Label: Legacy Rated: NONE WorkNameSort: Progressions: 100 Years of Jazz Guitar A friend of mine who works for a large record label once told me that jazz records count for only one-tenth of 1 percent of records sold in the United States. Tragically, he told me this about a…
Night Beat
Night Beat Label: RCA/Legacy Rated: NONE WorkNameSort: Night Beat One of Sam Cooke’s most rewarding albums, Night Beat has nonetheless been somewhat overlooked, a situation that will hopefully be rectified with this new reissue. This could be due to its doleful soulfulness and lack of upbeat radio hits like “Chain Gang” or it could be…
Helicopter Hearts
Helicopter Hearts Label: Orac Rated: NONE WorkNameSort: Helicopter Hearts An earful of Helicopter Hearts holds mostly personal listening and may leave shivering and uncaged anxiety in its wake. Under the Apendics Shuffle alias, Kenneth Gibson’s clicks, coded vocal bursts and bubbling synth buzzes find a home over minimal techno beats. While it’s far from the…
Berio: Sinfonia/Ekphrasis
Berio: Sinfonia/Ekphrasis Label: Deutsche Grammophon Rated: NONE WorkNameSort: Berio: Sinfonia/Ekphrasis Martin Luther King Jr., Samuel Beckett, Gustav Mahler and Claude Levi-Strauss all make their way into Sinfonia as lyrical and musical sources, but the oddest thing about Berio’s 1968 piece is that its debut performance featured the Swingle Singers intoning these typically fragmented vocal parts.…
MYSTERY STRAIN
Broken Flowers Studio: Focus Features Rated: R Website: http://www.brokenflowersmovie.com/ Release Date: 2005-09-16 Cast: Bill Murray, Jeffrey Wright, Sharon Stone, Frances Conroy, Jessica Lange Director: Jim Jarmusch Screenwriter: Jim Jarmusch Music Score: Mulatu Astatke WorkNameSort: Broken Flowers Our Rating: 2.00 With Ghost Dog: The Way of the Samurai, Jim Jarmusch at last embraced soulfulness and blatant…
EAT THESE WORDS
When I’m asked where to go for a good meal, other than spout my favorites willy-nilly, I can now recommend a guidebook to hungry restaurant seekers: Orlando Chow by Bob Mervine of the Orlando Business Journal. Mervine, too, faced the where-to-eat dilemma one too many times, so he decided to put together a book of…
SHOWING PROMISE: WRITER TURNS TO THE STAGE
No one could say that first-time playwright Sheri Reynolds is afraid of bold moves and big metaphors. In her Orabelle’s Wheelbarrow – which won the Women Playwrights’ Initiative’s second annual writing competition and has its world premiere this week at the Orlando Rep –an elderly woman moves about the stage pushing a wheelbarrow full of…
CROP CIRCLE
How are you going to keep them in drama class after they’ve been down on the farm? That’s the question facing the three-man cast of The Drawer Boy, a culture-clash tale conceived by Canadian playwright Michael Healey and directed by Fran Hilgenberg at Theatre Downtown. In 1972, theater major Miles (Daniel Cooksley) gets shagged out…
CENSORED!
Just four days before the 2004 presidential election, a prestigious British medical journal published the results of a rigorous study by Dr. Les Roberts, a widely respected researcher. Roberts concluded that close to 100,000 people had died in the invasion and occupation of Iraq. Most were noncombatant civilians. Many were children. But that news didn’t…
ROBERTS’ RULES
We all know this type of guy: smug-but-mildly-heartwarming smile; squinty eyes wet with either tears or allergies; strong jaw line just low enough below the ears to suggest that he wants to hear everything you have to say, to tilt his head like a cocker spaniel and tell you that everything will indeed be all…
Happytown
So last week, while perusing Newsmax (www.newsmax.com), which we do every once in a while for the entertainment value, we saw a headline that could not be ignored: “Mel Martinez for Supreme Court?” Pure speculation, of course, but as the folks at Newsmax proudly boast, they identified John Roberts as a probable nominee last year.…
NO ‘BUTTS’ ABOUT IT!
Regular readers know I make anywhere from three to 12 “butt jokes” a week in this column. This, however, is no time for anal fixations – because we are facing the busiest, most entertaining week of TV all year. OMIGOD. For example! On Thursday, it’s the season premiere of Survivor: Guatemala (CBS, 8 p.m.), while…
DOES CRIME PAY?
SEPT. 6, 7:30 P.M.: A young woman left the comfort of her home in the 5200 block of Greenery Court for a couple hours. Unfortunately, someone invaded her personal space while she was out. After kung fu-kicking in her front door, the suspect rummaged through a kitchen refrigerator. “Everything appeared to be trashed,” police reports…
NIX SKIN FLICKS
A friend of mine is setting up a website for feminist (mostly queer) porn. She asked me if I wanted to be in it, with or without my boyfriend of two years. After clarifying that I wouldn’t be making porn with people I didn’t want to do it with and that I like it a…
Notable Noise
Hey, everybody. Just wanted to let everyone know that I love every single band that calls Orlando home. They’re all great and wonderful and I can’t find any possible reason that they aren’t all successful. I don’t know what got into me on those occasions when I deigned to express a somewhat critical or –…
Letters
WHAT ABOUT THE COAST GUARD? I am a Coast Guard recruiter in Miami Lakes, and after reading your article on recruiting [“Uncle Sam really wants you,” Sept. 8]. I was wondering what the Coast Guard recruiter told you; or was the poor ol’ Coast Guard left out of all the reindeer games as usual? Our…
Rob Brezny’s Free Will Astrology
ARIES (March 21-April 19) “Something we were withholding made us weak,” wrote Robert Frost. I hope you’ll consider the possibility that this describes your current predicament. Your strength is being compromised by a feeling you’re not exploring or an experience you’re denying yourself or a gift you’re refusing to give. You may think you’re protecting…
TIME TO MEET THE NO-NUTS
In July, Uttar Pradesh Eunuchs Association in Lucknow, India, demanded that the district magistrate and the senior superintendent of police order cops to begin exposing fake eunuchs by lifting their skirts to verify their status. Charlatans, according to the group, deprive real eunuchs of “legitimate” income (a large part of which derives from eunuchs’ entering…
THE KARMA BUMS
“I think panty purses are the new cummerbund,” stitches my waifish friend Chloe, who is clearly named that because 1) one shoulder is exposed by her long, sexy slip dress and 2) she probably hasn’t had a meal since Kids came out. She goes on to extol the virtues of the cummerbund and the fact…
WRONG, WRONGER, WRONGEST
SKILLS TEST FOR NEW FEMA DIRECTORS This is a test of knowledge and aptitudes you are expected to hold as an applicant for the position of FEMA director. Questions cover disciplines including math, logic, economics, analogies and professional ethics. (Yes, seriously.) Read each question carefully and mark the BEST answer on your answer sheet. Use…
