A Florida woman is selling a chicken tender shaped like a manatee for $5,000

click to enlarge PHOTO VIA MELINDA BRITT DISBROW/FACEBOOK
Photo via Melinda Britt Disbrow/Facebook
Last December someone spent $120K on a banana duct-taped to a wall at Miami’s Art Basel, so it shouldn’t be much of a shocker that a Florida woman is now selling a manatee-shaped chicken tender for $5K on Facebook Marketplace.

Posted yesterday by Riverview resident Melinda Britt Disbrow under “Antiques and Collectibles,” the high-priced poultry piece, which is called “Tender,” is still in “new” condition.

“It was a hectic work day back at the dental office after the holidays,” said Disbrow in a message to Creative Loafing Tampa Bay. “I needed a little fuel to get me through my day. There is a Culver’s just across the street from our practice. I thought chicken tenders would hit the spot! I was thrilled to see my special tender as the last one remaining.”

Disbrow also mentioned that “Tender” was purchased from the Culver’s on Big Bend Road, which is coincidentally the same road that leads to the Manatee Viewing Center in Apollo Beach.

As you can see in the listing, compared to actual manatees the chicken collectible clearly does resemble the aquatic mammal to almost a near-perfect anatomic level; plus it can be either displayed or eaten.

A true Florida Christmas miracle.

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