The good news about Netflix's series of 'The Sandman': Neil Gaiman was actively involved in the development

The bad news? So was David S. Goyer.

"Clusterf*k: Woodstock '99" premieres Wednesday on Netflix.
"Clusterf*k: Woodstock '99" premieres Wednesday on Netflix. photo via Netflix

Everything new on Netflix, Hulu, Amazon Prime, HBO Max and the rest.

Premieres Wednesday, Aug. 3:

Clusterf*k: Woodstock '99 — A three-episode docuseries details the violence and chaos that ensued when the organizers of the now-infamous anniversary concert made the fatal mistake of booking Limp Bizkit — not realizing they'd actually show up! (Netflix)

Reservation Dogs — Taika Waititi and Sterlin Harjo's hit comedy about life as an Indigenous American returns to rack up further accolades for advancing the cause of representation. To that end, new additions to the cast for Season 2 include ... Marc Maron and Megan Mullally. Hmm, sounds like somebody listed "Did I mention I'm one-eighth Cherokee?" under "Special Skills." (Hulu)

Premieres Thursday, Aug. 4:

All or Nothing: Arsenal — The third iteration of the U.K. football-documentary series follows the Islington team on their quest to return to the top. Kind of surprising they ever left, given that they've had the lifelong support of John Lydon's entire family. And you know that bunch are a regular rabbit's foot! (Amazon Prime)

Beavis and Butthead — Hot on the heels of their recent comeback feature — in which they, like, Did the Universe or something — everybody's favorite suburban morons are starring in their first series of original episodes in 11 years. It's probably just as well they missed that run of months in 2020 when you couldn't get teepee for your bunghole. (Paramount+)

Kakegurui Twin — This anime prequel depicts Mary Saotome's first year at Hyakkou Private Academy, where students are ranked based on their gambling winnings. You know, just like they do in major-league baseball. (Netflix)

Lady Tamara — Her new reality series pulls back the curtain on the fabulous life of Tamara Falcó, a Spanish aristocrat and socialite. Gonna tell my kids this is how we used to say "unemployed." (Netflix)

Super Giant Robot Brothers — Mark Andrews (an Oscar winner for Pixar's Brave) directs a futuristic series about robot siblings who have to stop bickering long enough to fend off an alien invasion. Just what we all needed: robots who rock 'em, sock 'em and then argue bitterly over Mom's will. (Netflix)

Sweet Life: Los Angeles — Just two weeks after the premiere of her comedy series Rap Sh!t, Issa Rae continues her friendly-but-total takeover of HBO Max with a second season of her reality show about successful Black 20-somethings in South L.A. Now all she needs is to found a clothing brand that can later be found guilty of discriminatory hiring and ties to a Latin American drug cartel, and she'll basically own streaming forever. (HBO Max)

Wedding Season — When two Indian-Americans fake a romantic relationship to placate their marriage-obsessed parents, guess what happens? Give yourself a point if you answered "They actually fall in love." But you've been watching too much true-crime stuff if your first guess was "They find her severed head in the trunk of a Prius just outside San Bernardino." (Netflix)

What Josiah Saw — Robert Patrick — yes, the T-1000 himself — plays a family patriarch who summons his children to his farmhouse in hopes of breaking a decades-old curse. Personally, I wouldn't be going unless he could tell me the name of the family dog. Because y'all remember how he tried that crap before. (Shudder)

click to enlarge Neil Gaiman’s "The Sandman" premieres Friday on Netflix. - photo via Netflix
photo via Netflix
Neil Gaiman’s "The Sandman" premieres Friday on Netflix.

Premieres Friday, Aug. 5:

Carter — South Korea sends us a sci-fi thriller about an amnesiac who's on a mission to save the world, spurred on by a voice in his head and equipped with a bomb in his mouth. Wow, they really thought Herschel Walker was the right man for the job? (Netflix)

LEGO Star Wars: Summer Vacation — In the third seasonal special starring the only Jedi who are capable of getting caught between your toes, the Star Wars gang hits the beach for some fun, sun and to reminiscence about dog days past. Listen, of course Darth Vader wore a tropical-print tank top. These minifigs are canon, dammit! (Disney+)

Luck — This animated comedy about a woman with terrible luck got dropped by Paramount when handsy ex-Pixar head John Lasseter came aboard as producer. But to be fair, who else knows more about women with terrible luck? (Apple TV+)

The Outlaws — Straight from the U.K. comes Season 2 of the crime comedy about seven strangers who are brought together to perform community service, whereupon they fall into possession of a bag full of money. Given that one of them is Christopher Walken, the other six should probably just be grateful it isn't a watch. (Amazon Prime)

Prey — A Native American woman is the protagonist of this latest installment in the Predator franchise, which also happens to be streaming's first-ever feature with Comanche subtitles. Well, that's certainly going to make things easier for Megan Mullally. (Hulu)

Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: The Movie — In a full-length feature based on the animated series, our heroes in a half-shell are sent on an epic quest by a mysterious visitor who arrives from the future with a dire warning. Right, like what's he going to threaten us with this at this point? We already know Herschel Walker's going to be the president. (Netflix)

The Sandman — The good news: Neil Gaiman was actively involved in the development of his seminal comic as a live-action streaming series. The bad news: So was David S. Goyer. That's like allowing Ernest Hemingway to write his own screenplay for The Sun Also Rises as long as he brings along Uwe Boll to keep him out of trouble. (Netflix)

The Snoopy Show — Season 2 continues with seven more episodes starring everyone's favorite beagle. Remember, if Charlie Brown can't remember that dog's name, the kid is definitely a T-1000. (Apple TV+)

They/Them — Kevin Bacon stars in a Blumhouse slasher flick about a deranged killer who stalks the kids at a gay conversion camp. Can I just say that I am in love with this premise? I'd add that I'm equally enamored with the way that title juxtaposes pronoun-phobia and old-school horror nomenclature — but I'm worried Steve Doocy might agree, for all the wrong reasons. (Peacock)

Premieres Monday, Aug. 8:

Are You The One? U.K. — Britain gets its own version of the MTV dating show that uses scientific analysis to pair singles up with their soulmate. The twist is that since they're English, they all end up in loveless marriages because they don't have the boundaries to tell the computer to get stuffed. (Paramount+)

Premieres Tuesday, Aug. 9:

I Just Killed My Dad — With jaws still dropping over her highly rated The Girl in the Picture, documentarian Skye Borgman takes on the case of Anthony Templet, who at the age of 17 shot his father to death but was kept out of jail by a sympathetic defense lawyer and prosecutor. Guess you could say that decision set a Templet for lenient sentencing. (I throw myself on the mercy of the court.) (Netflix)

Locke & Key — The show's third and final season will also be its shortest, with only eight episodes. But don't worry that anything is going to feel abrupt and perfunctory, because series co-developer Carlton Cuse says his team mapped out where the story was going long ago. Of course, he said the same thing when he was wrapping up Lost. And now he has to go to work with a paper bag on his head and a hunk of Limburger tied around his neck so kids won't try to play with him. (Netflix)

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