Everything new on Netflix, Hulu, Paramount+, Disney+, Apple TV+, HBO Max, Shudder, and Amazon Prime this week. .
Premieres Wednesday, June 22:
Love & Gelato — The 2016 bestseller becomes a feature-length romcom in which a young woman visits Florence to fulfill a promise but ends up genuinely falling in love with the place. You know, just like what happened to you with Ocala. (Netflix)
Snowflake Mountain — Spoiled Gen Z-ers have to navigate the rugged terrain of the great outdoors in a reality show that couldn't be better positioned to exploit the resentments of oldsters. See how bad you think student debt is after you've had a cow kick you in the side of the skull, Tyler! (Netflix)
Umbrella Academy — After their time-traveling adventures in Season 2, the gang returns to 2019 in Season 3, only to find the world is not as it should be. See, some people might find that slightly ironic, because here in reality, 2019 was the last time most of us felt the world was remotely as it should be, and ... oh, fine, I'll shut up now. (Netflix)
Premieres Thursday, June 23:
The Bear — In this half-hour sitcom, a chef who's more accustomed to high-end cuisine finds himself running a Chicago sandwich shop after his brother commits suicide. If the thing were on Shudder, I'd be asking some very pointed questions about what they did with that corpse. (FX on Hulu)
Beavis and Butt-Head Do the Universe — OK, so these lamebrains' previous feature film, Beavis and Butthead Do America, was pretty much a bust. But that was 26 years ago, so maybe Mike Judge has learned a thing or two about making the characters work in longform since then. The story has our heroes hurtled forward in time from 1998 to try to make sense of the crazy modern world. Dialogue I long to hear: "In hindsight, Beavis, Kip Winger was a highly credible artist." (Paramount+)
Gordita Chronicles — Eva Longoria and Zoe Saldana are among the executive producers of a series set in 1980s Miami, with the arrival of an expatriate Dominican family the fulcrum for all sorts of pithy observations about life in Reagan's America. Pithy observation No. 1: "With all the s*** we're seeing now, isn't it amazing that we'll one day vote for Ron DeSantis by a two-to-one margin?" (HBO Max)
Little Ellen — Now that her talk show has come to an end, your only way to see Ellen DeGeneres on a regular basis is as an animated 7-year-old. To smooth the transition, the producers of Little Ellen Season 3 are working in storylines in which she turns a blind eye to bullying on the playground. (HBO Max)
Menudo: Forever Young — The abuse allegations against group Svengali Edgardo Diaz will be confronted head-on in this docuseries about the storied career of the seminal boy band. If it's a hit, stay tuned for Lou Pearlman: Forever Dead. (HBO Max)
Queen — A Polish-born tailor's attempts to renew his relationship with his daughter are complicated when she learns he used to be a drag queen. What, did she think he was just born with that talent for running up evening gowns? (Netflix)
Revealer — In 1987 Chicago, a stripper and a religious protester get trapped together in a peep-show booth while a cataclysm that might be the rapture rages outside. Wow, I can't believe somebody else has that dream too. (Shudder)
Premieres Friday, June 24:
At Home With the Gils — Brazilian singer-songwriter and former politician Gilberto Gil assembles his entire family in Rio to stage a mammoth concert, but the undertaking forces them to examine racism and other weighty issues. It's just like Thanksgiving at the Kardashians', except people are talking instead of posting TikToks. (Amazon Prime)
Boundless (Sin Limites) — Celebrate the 500th anniversary of the first circumnavigation of our planet by watching this series dramatization, which presents a slightly fictionalized account of the famous voyage that was begun by Ferdinand Magellan and completed by Juan Sebastián Elcano. How fictionalized is it? Well, Magellan's first mate is Wishbone. (Amazon Prime)
Chloe — In the latest entry in a genre I'll call "What hath Ingmar Bergman wrought," a disturbed 20-something takes on a new identity to investigate the death of a society woman she's become obsessed with. "Some people need to get a life," you chuckle as you fire off your 152nd fan letter to the Appliance Direct lady. (Amazon Prime)
Hello, Jack! The Kindness Show — Jack McBrayer continues on his quest to become the latter-day Mr. Rogers in a new special and four accompanying shorts, all designed to teach kids the virtues of gentle and considerate behavior. Watching together could be a learning experience for your entire family, IF SOME LITTLE BASTARD HADN'T HIDDEN THE REMOTE AGAIN. (Apple TV+)
Loot — Maya Rudolph plays a billionaire divorcée who tries to recover from a public meltdown by devoting herself to charity. Hey, I hear Kyle Mooney could use a handout right about now. (Apple TV+)
The Man From Toronto — Kevin Hart and Woody Harrelson are the stars of a feature-length buddy comedy in which an ordinary loser and a hitman get mistaken for each other after they share an Airbnb. Harrelson was a last-minute replacement for Jason Statham, and the movie was originally meant for theaters before it got sold off to streaming. But the Airbnb was never going to be a bathhouse sauna, no matter what Michael Musto says. (Netflix)
Man vs. Bee — Somewhere along the line, the mysterious tastemakers of our society — the ones who had already decreed Keanu Reeves is really a very good actor and the word "moist" is repellent for some reason — decided that Rowan Atkinson is actually funny, and now everybody just has to go along with it. Which is why we have to watch the erstwhile Mr. Bean as a housesitter bedeviled by a pesky bee. For an entire movie? No, for an entire series! Are you sure we couldn't just watch Keanu Reeves torture someone for saying "moist" for an hour? (Netflix)
Money Heist Korea: Joint Economic Area — The hit Spanish crime drama gets an East Asian spinoff, in which thieves attempt to rob the mint of a reunified Korean peninsula. I think I now have the primary source for my doctoral thesis, The Glorious Nation of North Korea Must Maintain Its Divine Independence, or Else. (Netflix)
The One That Got Away — Here's a poignant twist on the concept of the dating show: The contestants are all trying to make another go of it with someone they were involved with in the past. "But seriously, who's going to keep making the same mistake over and over again?" wonders reality vlogger Rick Scott. (Amazon Prime)
Rise — Disney mines inspiration from the true-life story of the Antetokounmpo brothers, whose life path took them from Nigeria to Greece to the NBA. (The NBA is a country now? Not that I'm complaining, mind you. At least they'd do something about AR-15s.) (Disney+)
Trevor: the Musical — From an Oscar-winning short to an Off-Broadway hit to a filmed Disney original, here's the story of a 13-year-old who learns to accept his queer identity. If you try watching in Florida, you'll automatically be redirected to a Bonanza marathon on Cozi TV. (Disney+)
Premieres Tuesday, June 28:
Blasted — Real events inspired this Norwegian comedy about former laser-tag champs who have to save the world when extraterrestrials attack in the middle of a bachelor party. See, they say real events only "inspired" it because the actual attack came during a gender reveal. (Netflix)
Cristela Alonzo: Middle Classy — The hard-working actor/comic returns with a sequel to her first stand-up special, Lower Classy. In a surprise move, for number three, she'll be bypassing the expected Higher Classy for the slightly more thoughtful Drinky Is the Curse of the Working Classy. (Netflix)
Only Murders in the Building — Season 2 turns the tables by making our true-crime podcasters murder suspects themselves. Guest performers include Shirley MacLaine and Amy Schumer, the latter of whom Vanity Fair says is playing a "slightly unbearable version of herself." So it's the "slightly" that's the distinction, then? (Hulu)
