Mike Bianchi is the world’s stupidest human
Or, at least, he wrote what is quite possibly the stupidest column in the history of sports journalism today. His premise: Build it and they will come. The wins, that is. The Orlando Magic have told us; the Arizona Cardinals have shown us. If ever you doubted that a new arena or a new stadium…
GREENER PASTURES
The raw food movement sprouts in Winter Park
ILLUSIONARY INTIFADA
Ex-soldier’s animated doc paints stunning picture
PURE RAGE
A father kills to preserve daughter’s chastity
DARK CITY
It seems odd that the most eerily Southern Gothic act currently gripping the scene should call New York City home. Rather than that apex of urbanity, the music of O’Death — in which banjos, fiddles and junkyard percussion dangle and writhe like serpents in an Appalachian church revival — conjures America’s most secluded regions. “Greg…
THE ABSENT ONES
How many articles about Orlando music start with a reference to the city’s fallen status as the epicenter of the pop universe? And why should this, an article about an “electro dancehall” production team on their international indie grind, be another one? Because when Alex G is involved, it’s kind of necessary. To the blog…
FROZEN EMOTIONS
In the myth of Orpheus and Eurydice, the young and enraptured lovers — he, the son of a muse; she, a beautiful wood nymph — become separated by Eurydice’s early death and her subsequent journey to the underworld. Orpheus so sadly laments the loss of his wife that he creates music on his lyre that…
THE ‘SNACK’ WORKOUT
Two weeks ago PBS began airing Make ‘Em Laugh, a superb documentary series on “the funny business of America.” The premiere episode focused on slapstick kings of silent films and early talkies: Charlie Chaplin, Buster Keaton, Laurel and Hardy, Harpo Marx and the Three Stooges. If they’d been alive back then, the seven members of…
HOLY BOY BAND!
Orlando was the epicenter of the turn-of-the-century boy-band craze, so it’s fitting that the Altar Boyz are winding down their nationwide tour of “bingo halls and youth group rallies” here at Theatre Downtown. You may not have heard of this nearly famous quintet, but their synthetic songs and pop-archetype personas will be instantly familiar. In…
YOU DON’T SAY?
Maybe nobody saw it coming — actually, maybe everybody did — but all is not well with the city’s year-old foray into downtown pedestrian customer service. The Downtown Ambassadors program, officially launched in January 2008, rolled Segways onto the sidewalks in hopes of keeping up urban appearances for what the mayor and downtown developers predicted…
SOUTH OF THE BORDER
This week’s release of The Uninvited, an American remake of the intense South Korean gut-twister A Tale of Two Sisters, proves once again that nothing in this world is sacred, least of all an original film. But instead of exploring capitalism in motion, we’re going to explore the South Korean film culture that spawned A…
BLISTER
Do you feel that? It’s that prickly-skinned smack feeling of zeitgeist deflation, the odd swinging chandelier-heads mouthing along some hazy mantra of change, change, change before exploding into a million beautiful color bits and click-clacking their tinny rattle down the hallway to the new. Everything is somehow better, cuter, brighter and blusterier than before; I…
FREE WILL ASTROLOGY
ARIES (March 21-April 19) Don’t tell me you have nothing to be thankful for. Your parents could have named you “Hooligan” or “Lightsaber” or “Flu,” and they didn’t. There are no photos floating around the Internet that show you riding a pig in the nude. No one has ever broken up with you via text…
SAVAGE LOVE
Longtime reader, first-time writer. In last week’s column, there was a letter from a young, just-out gay kid who is not ready for anal sex. Please excuse a question from a naive but well-meaning/curious straight guy … but what other kinds of gay sex are there? Just hands-on and oral, kind of like what us…
THIS LITTLE UNDERGROUND
It’s official. Obama’s sworn in — er, twice — and the universal excitement over his inauguration echoed in the local music scene. The beat Headlining one of the downtown inauguration celebrations were local boys Gasoline Heart (Jan. 20, Back Booth). It was a golden day to be an American, so their domestic, swollen-hearted brand of…
LIVE ACTIVE CULTURES
“Whole world’s comin’ to an end,” said Mickey Knox to Mallory in Natural Born Killers, and judging by the economic news he might have been right. Despite Obama’s ascendancy, the darkness doesn’t look to get any lighter in the near future, especially for our arts-based businesses. In recent weeks, the Plaza Theatre shut down its…
COUNCIL WATCH
A real mixed bag popped open upon the dais as this week’s inauguration-hangover edition of your city at work whittled its way through another joyless civic hour. Mayor Buddy Dyer was lamenting the obvious with his acknowledgement of depleting tourist development taxes and what that means for the entertainment trifecta. (“We will work every angle…
HAPPYTOWN
“It all comes down to this roll. Roy Munson, a man-child with a dream to topple bowling giant Ernie McCracken. If he strikes, he’s the 1979 Odor-Eaters Champion. He’s got one foot in the frying pan and one in the pressure cooker. Believe me, as a bowler, I know that right about now, your bladder…
