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Get to know the twelve Christmas cats of Orlando, and maybe bring one home 

Page 5 of 6

click to enlarge PHOTO BY PAUL WEAN
  • Photo by Paul Wean

Snow

AGE: 2 years old

GENDER: Female

STAR SIGN: Scorpio

ID: A391746

CURRENT HOME: Orange County Animal Services

THINGS THAT MAKE ME MEOW: Artisanal catnip, feet that are under blankets

THINGS THAT MAKE ME HISS: Tinder conversations that begin with "Did you see that article on the Huffington Post?"

GUILTY PLEASURES: Empty plastic shopping bags, bobby pins

SECRET WISH: To lead an all-cat choir singing "Do They Know It's Christmas?"

JOBS BEFORE MODELING: Hypnotist (LOOK INTO MY EYES)

PEOPLE I ADMIRE: Robert Smith, Bob Morris

AMBITIONS: To be a MacArthur Genius Grant recipient

FEARS: Bodies of water, Twitter

FAVORITE THING TO DO WHEN MY HUMANS ARE AWAY: Workshop my modern dance routines

click to enlarge PHOTO BY PAUL WEAN
  • Photo by Paul Wean

Caterina

AGE: 1 year old

GENDER: Male (but gender is just a social construct)

ID NUMBER: A391469

PERSONAL MOTTO: "Raaaeeeeeerrreee"

HOBBIES: Sunbathing, pressing my face against yours, sticking my paws under the bathroom door because I know goddamn well you're in there doing something

WEIRD TALENT: I can position my butt directly in your face while you eat, no problem.

THREE TRUTHS AND A LIE: I've never been to Paris. I hate dogs. I can swallow a fidget spinner.

DARK CONFESSION: I once pretended the owner of a cool beach house was alive so that me and my buds could throw an awesome weekend rager.

IDEAL HUMAN: Not picky at all, just looking for a human that's subordinate and rich in kitty litter

TURN-OFFS: Baths

CELEBRITY CRUSH: John Cena

DREAM JOB: I'd love to curl up on Rick Scott's head and have him wear me like a turban.

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