Donald Trump reportedly planning presidential campaign launch in Tallahassee to spite Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis

Donald Trump is a knobbly turd rubbed into a shag rug. He's a moneyed cretin getting Big Mac grease all over the grips of his high-end golf clubs. He's an effete fancy lad who has turned grandparents' brains into sludge so that they might believe he's America's strongman. But you have to admit, he can be pretty funny.

The latest news out of the camp of our pettiest, cattiest president is that he's looking to launch his presidential campaign in Florida to spite rising Republican star and current governor Ron DeSantis. Rolling Stone  reports that Trump was asking his associates to find venues near the Governor's Mansion in Tallahassee, so that he can stick it to the only other 2024 GOP candidate that might have a shot at the White House.  It's a few steps up from renting out a club before Graydon Carter can snag it for an Oscars watch party.

Sources close to Trump say the former prez called DeSantis "overrated" on multiple occasions and noted that he dinged the mealy-mouthed governor for his lack of charisma before a crowd.

"One time that he did bring up the Florida [launch] scenario was quickly followed by him commenting on how terrible DeSantis was at public speaking and commanding an audience … [and that he’s] lacking in so much charisma and he’s so boring that Florida Republicans would leave Ron immediately for Trump [in a 2024 match-up],” the source said.


DeSantis has held that he's not running for president in 2024 and he kicked off this week thousands of miles from the Governor's Mansion. As part of his ongoing commitment to fighting the stupidest battles while the state sinks, he stopped by Fox News to state that protesting outside the home of a Supreme Court justice is tantamount to insurrection.