POLICE BEAT


Aug. 6, 10:42 A.M.: The night before school starts and all down the block/Shaving cream swells on the concrete sidewalk/ Mysterious cars leave the scene with tires blazing/Public relations people deny that it's hazing/Toilet paper dangles in the pale moonlight/But no one will narc and no one's in sight.

In the 2200 block of West Yale Street in College Park, officer Stanley was dispatched in reference to some criminal mischief. The officer met with a 46-year-old victim who provided a sworn statement in reference to unknown persons toilet papering her house.

The victim told police her dogs started barking at around 10:30 p.m.; she went outside to find "numerous vehicles leaving the area in multiple directions." She inspected her yard and found "toilet paper thrown into several trees, and garbage that had been placed curbside for Monday morning pickup was littered throughout her yard. In addition, shaving cream had been sprayed all over her vehicle," reports state. The suspect(s) also used the shaving cream to write "Class of 2007 Rules!" on the sidewalk and drew a penis on the victim's front porch. The complainant thinks that she was victimized by seniors of Edgewater High School because her daughter is a junior and it is "an apparent annual tradition," reports state.

Lindsley Wright, media relations director at Orange County Public Schools, noted that the OCPS has policies against students' engaging in activities that damage property. Wright, however, also lamented the waste of toilet tissue. "In the words of my late father, ‘That's a terrible waste of toilet paper,'" he says. "He lived through the Depression."

A 17-year-old Edgewater senior, who would only divulge details of the event under the condition of anonymity, told this reporter that this kind of vandalism brings students together. "All the cliques join together for this — the nerds, the jocks, even the God squad, God squad being a group of students who say they don't cuss, drink or party, but do — it's just a prank that the seniors do to popular juniors." The source stated that there were about 50 seniors involved in this year's bonding ritual.

The victim's daughter, a 17-year-old Edgewater High School junior, told Police Beat that she's not upset about the incident. "I'm not pissed. I'm not pissed because I get to do it next year!" It appeared the student would have been more upset if her house hadn't been targeted.

The owner of the house, however, was much less amused. She chased away bystanders who tried to clean up the mess and placed one of the empty cans of shaving cream in a Ziploc bag in to preserve latent fingerprints. She left the trash strewn about her yard with the expectation that the perps would do the right thing and come clean it up. They did not.

Sgt. Barbara Jones of the Orlando Police Department told Police Beat that it is very difficult to investigate crimes of this nature, and noted that there are precious few leads in the case. Anyone who tips Crimeline at 1-800-423-8477 could be eligible for a reward, however.

An independent investigation by this correspondent indicated that the toilet paper used in the crime was likely Publix's "GreenWise Market" brand, a two-ply tissue made of 100 percent recycled paper. Further analysis revealed that the toilet paper is, according to the manufacturer, "Strong, soft and contains no inks, dyes or fragrances." Approximately 990 square feet, or 7,920 sheets of toilet paper, were used in the commission of this crime.

Samples of shaving cream taken from the sidewalk by this correspondent were redolent of menthol, which doesn't really narrow the possibilities much.

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