;I am a straight female and have been in a loving relationship with my boyfriend for three years. I'm also a politically connected woman, a very "in control" type, and when I say "no" I mean "no." A little more about me: I was born in Alabama, I play the piano, and I was a professor at Stanford University for a while. I currently hold a high-ranking position in Washington, D.C., and I have a tattoo of George W. Bush on my right breast. Other than that, I've always been an average gal, especially in bed, but now I'm in a real "state."
;; My problem goes back to the beginning of the relationship. In the very beginning, my boyfriend tried to lick and finger my ass. I very firmly told him to stop and that anal sex totally disgusted me and that I would never allow anything — his cock included — into my butt. Needless to say, I hurt his feelings, and for a couple of years he respected my demands.
;; However, during the past year I've allowed him to lick and finger me there, and I have even let him insert a narrow vibrator. At first I found this disgusting, but I let him play just to avoid hurting his feelings. Soon I came to enjoy the sexual stimulation it gave me, but I didn't tell him that I liked it.
;; Now the problem: Last month, after way too much to drink, he tried to slip his cock in my ass and I finally let him in. OH MY GOD! What a fantastic experience. Talk about fireworks! Just thinking about it turns me on. But at the same time I feel guilty for having done it because I think it's dirty and that only sluts do that. I never told him how much I liked it. We've made love since then, but he avoids my butt like he used to. I'd love to do it again, but can't bring myself to ask for it. Is there any way that I can have the best of both worlds? Thank you, Dan.
;;Can't Openly Naturally Discuss Interest
;; P.S. If possible, could you please print this letter? He reads your column faithfully, and if he sees it he just might get up his courage and try again.
;;
;Here's your letter, CONDI. Hopefully your boyfriend will read it, recognize you, and find the courage to bang away at your ass without making you beg for it first, thereby preventing you from having to admit what a dirty little butt-sex-obsessed slut you are.
;;Well! It looks like my work here is done.
;;Oh no, wait: Before we move on, a word of warning to others out there who think they recognize CONDI. This butt-sex-obsessed slut included tons of identifying details in her letter: age, height, weight, profession, hair color, location — everything short of a Google map to her apartment. CONDI did this, of course, because she wanted to make damn sure her boyfriend recognized himself and her when he read the letter. What CONDI didn't anticipate, it seems, were the odds that her friends, family, and co-workers might also read the letter and recognize her. Since I'm pretty certain CONDI didn't intend to out herself to everyone she knows as an ankle-grabbin', pillow-chompin', butt-sex-lovin' slut, I changed one or two identifying details in an effort to preserve her anonymity.
;;Unfortunately, there is now a small risk that CONDI's boyfriend won't recognize himself or her, which would defeat the whole purpose of running CONDI's letter in the first place. (Hint for CONDI's boyfriend: She doesn't really have a George W. Bush tattoo on her right breast — I made that part up!) There's also a chance that the details I invented to throw CONDI's friends and family off her musky, musky scent might match some other woman out there, someone whose personal and professional history, by sheer coincidence, just so happens to match the one I've invented for CONDI. This could result in that person being on the receiving end of some unwanted anal attention.
;;But that's a risk we're just going to have to take.
;;
;;I wanted to say thanks for your donation to Planned Parenthood. I have always been pro-choice in concept, but other issues, like the environment, ranked higher on my political agenda. However, earlier this year I was faced with an un-planned pregnancy. I was grateful to have a choice and to be able to make a decision based on what was the best thing for me, my partner and my two children.
;; When I talked to my doctor, she was supportive, but I was surprised to learn that I would not need a referral and that my insurance would not be covering anything. All I needed to do I was make an appointment at Planned Parenthood. I had imagined Planned Parenthood to be a last refuge for teenagers and the uninsured, not for me at this point in my life. But there is no doctor in Tucson, outside of Planned Parenthood, who will perform an abortion! Without Planned Parenthood, my ability to choose would have evaporated. Considering the nonstop efforts to shut Planned Parenthood down, even here in liberal Tucson, I find this very frightening.
;; Thank you for your battle to protect sexual and reproductive rights — you've helped me wake up to what's at stake.
;;Grateful Tucson Girl
;;
;;Thanks for sharing, GTG, and thanks for the strokes.
;;;But making a donation to Planned Parenthood isn't heroic — really, anyone can do it. Just write out a check to Planned Parenthood, put it in an envelope, and mail it to Planned Parenthood Federation of America, 434 West 33rd Street, New York, New York, 10001, or go to www.plannedparenthood.org and make a donation online.
;; [email protected]
