Wednesday, 2
Drunken Problem Solving: All the Holidays Edition
If you haven't made it to Lil Indies' Drunken Problem Solving nights, you're missing out on some hilarious conversation. The game plays less like a trivia night and more like a guided conversation with your friends. Host Trevor Fraser posits a hypothetical situation to the teams who sign up and asks them what kinds of problems might arise. The "best" problem in the first round then becomes the problem to creatively solve in the second. A recent session took the premise of a device that records memories and solved the resulting problem by training people to masturbate to C-SPAN, for example. As far as bar games go, it's a unique experience that promotes interesting interactions with your friends, and we can't wait to see what holiday-themed problems get solved at this iteration. – Thaddeus McCollum
8 p.m. | Lil Indies, 1036 N. Mills Ave. | willspub.org | free
Wednesday, 2
Silver Apples
The alien electronic pop of Silver Apples builds sensationally with disruptive rhythms that baffle your toes, which hysterically tap like founding member Simeon is some bizarre minstrel hypnotist with his legendary homemade synth. Although the band's output is limited – two sleeper favorites from the late '60s, Silver Apples and Contact, plus comeback releases in 1998 (including The Garden, unreleased music from original duo, Simeon and Danny Taylor) – their jarring dance tracks like "You and I" and "Oscillations," as well as curious covers like "Ruby," struck a chord with experimental artists in the underground for decades following the duo's disbanding. When Simeon fell victim to a car crash in 1998, Silver Apples fans stressed his recovery, but he thankfully bounced back, like the world is truly the anti-gravity whirlwind he creates sonically. He keeps Taylor's beats alive (Taylor passed away in 2005 of a heart attack) electronically, now performing as a solo artist in Florida for the first time in ages (not to mention this is one of only two dates, not a tour, so thank the cosmos he sprang from he has ties here in openers Obliterati). Lucky, lucky us. – Ashley Belanger
with Obliterati, Moon Jelly | 9 p.m. | Will's Pub, 1042 N. Mills Ave. | willspub.org | $10-$12
Thursday, 3
Christmas in the Park
If you've been to visit the Charles Hosmer Morse Museum of American Art, you know that the collection of Tiffany leaded-glass windows it houses is spectacular. Once a year the museum takes nine of these precious windows, illuminates them and puts them on display outdoors in Central Park for the world to view while the Bach Festival Choir and Brass Ensemble performs a Christmas concert. It's a surreal but gorgeous annual event to ring in the Christmas season. It's also a wildly popular affair – hundreds of people pack into the park with blankets, folding tables, wine and snacks to make an evening of it. People can start setting up any time after 4 p.m. to get a good view of the stage and ensure a space in the park, which is guaranteed to be standing-room-only (and even standing room is limited) well before the 6:15 p.m. kickoff. Word to the wise: Get there early. Bring lots of wine. – Erin Sullivan
6:15 p.m. | Central Park, Park Avenue near the intersection of Garfield Avenue, Winter Park | 407-645-5311 | morsemuseum.org | free
Friday, 4
Accidental Music Festival Presents Ensemble AMF
The northward pull of New York on Orlando's creatives is, well, magnetic, and Chris Belt, founder of the Accidental Music Festival, wasn't immune – despite the fact that the new music series has continued here in Orlando, Belt and his wife, oboe player Beatriz Ramirez, have lived in NYC since 2012. Perhaps that has some slight influence on this show: "One of the themes for this whole season is New York composers. Almost everything that we're doing has some connection to New York," says Belt. AMF's October presentation of New York-based quartet Yarn/Wire was rapturously received by those in attendance; like that concert, this week's show includes a 21st-century piece by seminal New York composer Steve Reich ("2x5") on its program, alongside other challenging modern compositions. Both Belts will perform as part of Ensemble AMF, along with percussionist Thad Anderson, drummer Nik Ritchie, pianist Jamila Tekalli and a player we've managed to wrest away from New York: new Orlando Phil music director Eric Jacobsen, on cello. Here's to reversing magnetic north. – Jessica Bryce Young
8 p.m. | Will's Pub, 1042 N. Mills Ave. | willspub.org | $10-$12
Friday, 4
Pokemon: Symphonic Evolutions
Do you want to be the very best, like no one ever was? Well, the only way you're going to catch 'em all at the Dr. Phillips Center is by tuning your eardrums like a wild Audino to the sweet sounds of Pokemon: Symphonic Evolutions. The Orlando Philharmonic brings the house down like a Snorlax using Giga Impact, and the content spans every major injury in the franchise – so expect your favorite tracks in full force. Bring your Squirtle Squad for the full experience, and take a Chancy on watching your favorite chirpy tunes evolve into full orchestral anthems like they were just hit with a Dawn Stone. If you end up wetting yourself from all the excitement, just tell the guy next to you that your trainer told you to use Water Gun. Don't worry: Nobody will think it's weird unless they take a Pikachu. – Adam McCabe
8 p.m. | Walt Disney Theater, Dr. Phillips Center for the Performing Arts, 445 S. Magnolia Ave. | 844-513-2014 | drphillipscenter.org
Saturday, 5
Krampusnacht
Basically the evil version of Santa, Krampus is said to visit homes on Dec. 5 to punish naughty children by giving them coal and swatting them with branches. Also, he looks like a medieval depiction of Satan, with fur covering his body and horns protruding from his skull, which is probably why he's become popular enough in the U.S. to have an eponymous movie made about him this year. Local artists-at-large Brendan O'Connor and Jeremy Seghers are throwing a Krampusnacht party at the Hammered Lamb to celebrate the vengeance-beast that's full of dark-humored holiday fun. Sing Krampus carols, participate in a Krampus costume contest or volunteer to be whipped by Krampus, then have a seat (if you can) and catch a Krampus tale told by Phantasmagoria, Orlando's premier goth steampunk circus troupe. Stick around for an appearance by Father Christmas, but pick up some gifts for someone else from Myrcury's Toybox or Deviant Dollz to get a head start on working your way off of Krampus' list for next year. – Thaddeus McCollum
8 p.m. | The Hammered Lamb, 1235 N. Orange Ave. | 407-704-3200 | thehammeredlamb.com | free
Saturday, 5
James Beard Celebrity Chef Dinner
There's no shortage of amazing food events in Orlando, especially at this time of year, but this may be a tough ticket to top. On Saturday night, the Four Seasons Resort Orlando hosts an eight-course dinner prepared by 10 legendary chefs (including Top Chef vets Edward Lee and Tony Mantuano and James Beard Award winners Gerard Craft and Norman Van Aken) from across the country. The over-the-top feast is part of a James Beard Foundation celebrity chef tour. It's got a hefty price tag at $235 per person, but that includes tax, gratuity and wine pairings by Four Seasons master sommelier James Tidwell – not to mention bonkers dishes like Lee's seared ribeye with gochujang butter, grits and radish bottarga and pastry chef Stefan Riemer's gianduja-citrus crèmeux with dehydrated milk foam and vanilla Chantilly. They say the best Christmas gifts are experiences, not stuff; if you can swing it, this dinner could be the best experiential gift you ever gave. – Jessica Bryce Young
6:30 p.m. | Capa at the Four Seasons Resort Orlando, 10100 Dream Tree Blvd. | 407-313-6161 | jamesbeard.org/events | $235
Tuesday, 8
A John Waters Christmas: Holier & Dirtier
John Waters has been America's favorite filthy filmmaker since the early 1970s, so at age 69 you might expect that the "Pope of Trash" would be taking it easy for the holidays. Instead, the near-septuagenarian has been all over lately, appearing on the recent season of RuPaul's Drag Race and penning multiple upcoming books. And rather than putting up his feet (clad in fabulous slippers, natch) by the fireplace this winter, he's hitting the road with a revamped reprise of his John Waters Christmas one-man monologue. Waters, who last appeared in Orlando during 2013's Come Out With Pride event, has been performing variations on this satirical seasonal survival guide for more than a decade. This year's adult-oriented Holier & Dirtier edition promises to "put the X in Xmas" with a fast-paced filleting of beloved traditions, from Santa Claus to Christmas trees. Feel free to dress like the late Divine (Xmas was her favorite holiday) but leave the dog crap at home, even if it's eggnog- flavored. – Seth Kubersky
7 p.m. | The Plaza Live, 425 N. Bumby Ave. | 407-228-1220 | plazaliveorlando.com | $38-$48
