Pick me a winner: Golden Globes edition

In the end, 2013 was not a strong year for film, nor was is a weak one. It turned out thoroughly mediocre. There were exceptional films, a lot of which are nominated here, and there were exceptionally bad films, which will fight it out for Razzie awards next month.

It's never been the quality of the films that fall under debate with the Globes, just the way they are voted upon. Where the Oscars are voted on by stars that you mostly know, the Golden Globes are are basically anonymous.

The only thing they keep doing right is getting the right hosts. Like Ricky Gervais before them, Tina Fey and Amy Poehler  are really the biggest reason to watch -- the only other reason to watch is to hopefully see the rare occurrence of someone being in the bathroom as they win.


As usual, I'll keep this strictly to film since I don't watch that much TV, except to say that Top of the Lake really was a fantastic miniseries, and Elisabeth Moss would blindly get my vote for Best Actress.

Don't forget that Jacki will be live Tweeting the Globes on @OrlandoWeekly.

Best Motion Picture – Drama

12 Years a Slave

Captain Phillips




-I enjoyed Rush a lot more than I thought I would, and though I don't see the appeal to NASCAR, I can see the appeal to F1 racing, especially the big cityscape ones like Monaco (though it doesn't personally appeal to me except in POV snatches). But 12 Years a Slave, Captain Phillips and Gravity are the only three real choices here, and you could make a convincing case for any of them. Gravity was thrilling and emotional at the same time and a technical achievement, Captain Phillips was incredibly tense, and 12 Years a Slave was Jesus-Fucking-Christ-level good. 12 Years a Slave would be my choice, but something tells me it'll be Captain Phillips.

Best Performance by an Actress in a Motion Picture – Drama

Cate Blanchett - Blue Jasmine

Sandra Bullock - Gravity

Judi Dench - Philomena

Emma Thompson - Saving Mr. Banks

Kate Winslet - Labor Day

-Bullock did pretty much carry Gravity on her own, and Judi Dench aside, none of the other actresses were in a film nominated for Best Picture. She would be my choice, but I think Cate Blanchett takes it.

Best Performance by an Actor in a Motion Picture – Drama

Chiwetel Eijofor - 12 Years a Slave

Idris Elba - Mandela

Tom Hanks - Captain Phillips

Matthew McConaughey - Dallas Buyer's Club

Robert Redford - All is Lost

-This award could be tethered to the Best Picture award, and so will my picks. Chiwetel Eijofor would be my pick, but I get the feeling it'll be Tom Hanks.

Best Motion Picture – Comedy Or Musical

American Hustle


Inside Llewyn Davis


The Wolf of Wall Street

-Will American Hustle ride its buzz to a win? I'd say so. I have a tough time picking for myself in this category because I haven't gotten to see Inside Llewyn Davis or Nebraska yet.

Best Performance by an Actress in a Motion Picture – Comedy Or Musical

Amy Adams - American Hustle

Julie Delpy - Before Midnight

Greta Gerwig - Frances Ha

Julia Louis-Dreyfus - Enough Said

Meryl Streep - August: Osage County

-I'd love to see Greta Gerwig win this because Frances Ha was that good, but I think Amy Adams will.

Best Performance by an Actor in a Motion Picture – Comedy Or Musical

Christian Bale - American Hustle

Bruce Dern - Nebraska

Leonardo DiCaprio - The Wolf of Wall Street

Oscar Issac - Inside Llewyn Davis

Joaquin Phoenix - Her

-If seeing Leo win for doing a line of blow out of a hooker's ass is wrong than I don't want to be right.

Best Animated Feature Film

The Croods

Despicable Me 2


-What a woeful category. Where is The Wind Rises? It would smoke this category if nominated, but Despicable Me 2 will probably win. It wasn't a terrible sequel, just not all that inspired.

Best Foreign Language Film

Blue is the Warmest Color

The Great Beauty

The Hunt

The Past

The Wind Rises

In a strange turn of affairs, this happens to be the only category that I've seen every film nominated. Usually, foreign films use award noms as a platform for wider release, but these all saw release last year in some capacity. For me, personally, The Great Beauty and the The Hunt stand head and shoulders above the rest. Blue is the Warmest Color was lost in its three hour emotional labyrinth, The Past was just simply a very good movie, and The Wind Rises suffers by comparison to Miyazaki's previous works. But I can't see any outcome other than Blue is the Warmest Color winning.

Best Performance by an Actress In A Supporting Role in a Motion Picture

Sally Hawkins - Blue Jasmine

Jennifer Lawrence - American Hustle

Lupita Nyong'o - 12 Years a Slave

Julia Roberts - August: Osage County

June Squibb - Nebraska

-Lupita Nyong'o certainly had the bravest performance, and I think she'll get the Globe but never say never when Jennifer Lawrence is involved.

Best Performance by an Actor In A Supporting Role in a Motion Picture

Barkhad Adbi - Captain Phillips

Daniel Bruhl - Rush

Bradley Cooper - American Hustle

Michael Fassbender - 12 Years a Slave

Jared Leto - Dallas Buyers Club

-Leto was incredible as Rayon in DBC, but I think Bradley Cooper gets it.

Best Director – Motion Picture

Alfonso Cuaron - Gravity

Paul Greengrass - Captain Phillips

Steve McQueen - 12 Years a Slave

Alexander Payne - Nebraska

David O. Russell - American Hustle

-McQueen would get it if I were handing it out, but I'm not. I think David O. Russell gets it for American Hustle.

Best Screenplay – Motion Picture

Spike Jonze - Her

Bob Nelson - Nebraska

Jeff Pope and Steve Coogan - Philomena

John Ridley - 12 Years a Slave

Eric Warren Singer and David O. Russell - American Hustle

-Again, this seems like it is American Hustle's to lose. I see it being the big winner on the night.

The Golden Globes air tonight at 8pm eastern on NBC. Let's see how badly I've done. 

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