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Tuesday, May 14, 2019

Burn Florida to the ground

Posted By on Tue, May 14, 2019 at 12:40 PM

You took it too far this time, Florida.

It's one thing for lovebugs to smash relentlessly onto our car windshields during their harmless mating season. Floridians are used to that. We don't even complain anymore when we accidentally inhale a horny couple.

But this video posted by Dana Hayes Erickson shows an egregious attack. The Sarasota resident was fishing with her husband and friends on a boat off Lido Key Beach when they were swarmed by a biblical-sized orgy of lovebugs in the middle of the ocean, WFTS Tampa Bay reports.

The terror in the video, which has over 2 million views, is obvious.

"We gotta get the hell out of here. We're taken over by bugs," a woman says. "This is fucked up."

"Look at that," another woman says, pointing to the seats crawling with interlocking black insects and letting out a cathartic scream as more of the randy turds have sex in her hat.

"They were everywhere," Erickson later told Bay News 9. "In the cabin of the boat. They were in our seats, under the seat mats, in our towels, in our shoes. Everywhere. My bathing suit."

Erickson told the TV station that they fled the lovebug attack at 40 miles an hour but that wasn't enough to get them off the boat. Two hours of power-washing finally cleaned off the gross corpses. The only trace left of those lovebugs is this disturbing video, which we will never be able to unsee.

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