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Thursday, April 26, 2012

Opening in Orlando -- April 27th, 2012

Posted By on Thu, Apr 26, 2012 at 12:40 PM

The Five-Year Engagement -- Jason Segel and Nick Stoller attempt to recapture that Forgetting Sarah Marshall magic via this portrait of a young couple on a long and winding path toward matrimony. That path had better include some fuckin’ vampire puppets, is all I’m saying. (R) [youtube iNhAslpICxE] Footnote -- Reviewed this issue. (PG)

The Pirates! Band of Misfits -- Aardman Animation casts Hugh Grant as the voice of a seafaring rogue who covets one thing and one thing only. Cheap street punanny? Nope, the Pirate of the Year award. But good guess. (PG)

[youtube aiaEQ2VZDpw] The Raven -- Reviewed this issue. (R)

Safe -- I swear to God I saw a TV spot for this pursuit thriller that listed its dramatic attributes as one-word ingredients (e.g., “Gangsters”), culminating in the minimalist, supremely persuasive “Statham.”  But I’ve looked and looked, and I can’t find the ad anywhere online. So maybe one of those narrative components -- like “car chases,” maybe -- hit the cutting-room floor at the last minute, forcing Lionsgate to pull the ad lest they run afoul of consumer watchdogs? That would suck, since I was really counting on this movie to supply 100 percent of my daily dosage of Riboflavin.  (R)

[youtube Mv2VZi5RD6c]

The Five-Year Engagement -- Jason Segel and Nick Stoller attempt to recapture that **Forgetting Sarah Marshall** magic via this portrait of a young couple on a long and winding path toward matrimony. That path had better include some fuckin’ vampire puppets, is all I’m saying. (R)

[youtube iNhAslpICxE]

Footnote -- Reviewed this issue. (PG)

http://orlandoweekly.com/film/footnote-1.1305618

The Pirates! Band of Misfits -- Aardman Animation casts Hugh Grant as the voice of a seafaring rogue who covets one thing and one thing only. Cheap street punanny? Nope, the Pirate of the Year award. But good guess. (PG)

[youtube aiaEQ2VZDpw]

The Raven -- Reviewed this issue. (R)

http://orlandoweekly.com/film/the-raven-1.1305620

Safe -- I swear to God I saw a TV spot for this pursuit thriller that listed its dramatic attributes as one-word ingredients (e.g., “Gangsters”), culminating in the minimalist, supremely persuasive “Statham.” But I’ve looked and looked, and I can’t find the ad anywhere online. So maybe one of those narrative components -- like “car chases,” maybe -- hit the cutting-room floor at the last minute, forcing Lionsgate to pull the ad lest they run afoul of consumer watchdogs? That would suck, since I was really counting on this movie to supply 100 percent of my daily dosage of Riboflavin. (R)

[youtube Mv2VZi5RD6c]


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