Some people should just elope. Groom Howard Brown, 31, was arrested in San Antonio, Texas, after allegedly shooting a guest at his wedding reception because the guest had brought along too many friends. ... Bride Kathy Naylor, 28, was arrested in Crystal River, Fla., after following home a guest from her reception and reigniting an earlier brawl. ... Newlyweds Marcia Alarcon and Carlos Alarcon-Schroder were jailed in Des Moines, Iowa, after brawling over whose parents they would visit first. ... And Marie Solomon, 41, was arrested at a friend's wedding in Bridgeport, Conn., for loudly and incessantly yelling out reasons why the couple should not be married.
A bout with crime
Boxer Tony Ayala Jr., whose promising career -- 27 wins, 0 losses and 24 knockouts -- was cut short in 1983 by a rape conviction for which he served 16 years in prison, won a big comeback fight in San Antonio in July. The 38-year-old gained a 10-round decision in a bout during which he wore a court-ordered beeper bracelet around his ankle so authorities could monitor his whereabouts. Last December, Ayala again was arrested, this time on a charge of burglary with intent to commit a sexual assault; he pleaded guilty to lesser charges in September. Ayala won the July fight despite a shoulder weakened by a bullet hole, put there by the woman whose house he had allegedly broken into.
In earnestly reported stories, the Wichita Eagle last month informed the Kansas community that more than a thousand 30-inch-long, dried corn-husk leaves had floated down from the sky onto the town. Two meteorologists said that no weather phenomenon could have accounted for it. To add to the mystery, a Wichita-area evangelical ministry had woven "corn husks" into its pro-life message in mid-July and took the phenomenon as a sign from God. Townspeople's favorite guess: It was an elaborate prank by University of Nebraska football fans.
Cavities can be dangerous
An article in the British Dental Journal warned people of the dangers involved in using foreign objects for relief of hemorrhoids, pointing to one patient who said he used a toothbrush for that purpose but inserted it too far and had to have it removed at a hospital by biopsy forceps.
Mary rode a little lamb ...
At rodeos across the country -- including Florida's Okeechobee Rodeo over Labor Day weekend -- kids as young as 3-years-old are riding sheep in the style of bronco busters. The endurance sport is called "mutton busting," and the ride is deemed a success if the children can stay on top of their little lambs for at least four seconds before inevitably acquiring the rodeo experience of being dumped on their backsides.
Casting call for kids
State investigators examining practices at Valdez Community Hospital in Alaska found that several physicians had routinely brought their kids (from teen-agers down to infants) into operating rooms and examining booths while the docs treated patients. Among the episodes was one girl who "assisted" her father in placing a cast on a patient, and a four-year-old who created a major scene in an operating room when a woman shrieked during her hip-replacement surgery.
From the July "Police Blotter" in the Williamson County Sun of Georgetown, Texas: "At a grocery store on the 600 block of Austin Avenue, a 27-year-old lawn specialist from Round Rock was arrested at 12:46 a.m. on charges of public lewdness. (A) male employee found the male customer between two aisles with his shorts and underwear pulled down around his ankles. The man was bent over and inserting a can of Big and Sexy brand hair spray lubricated with Suave lotion into his rectum. He told arresting officers he was attempting to sexually gratify himself. He was taken to jail."
The robber of the One Stop Grocery in Kenai, Alaska, in July got away. The store was packed with people at 9 p.m. when the man appeared, claimed to have a gun in his pocket and shouted, "Everybody freeze, don't move." However, everyone ignored him. He snatched some beer from the cooler and shouted again, "You people don't understand. I really mean it." One customer told him he could get in big trouble talking like that. Finally, the man cussed a bit, complained again that nobody was paying attention to him and left with the beer.
Robber is agog
Kevin Shegog, 41, was charged in Highland Heights, Ky., with eight gas-station robberies when police finally found a witness who could identify the getaway car: It was the one with the license plate "SHEGOG."
Sane and so-burn?
While celebrating her son's homecoming from college, Karyn Aikin suffered first and second degree burns on her face, incurred by igniting a shot glass full of 151-proof rum and trying to swallow it (Newfane, N.Y.) ... Professor Merryn Dineley announced he will start selling a historic-recipe beer in the Orkney Islands (Scotland) that is flavored with a trace of baked animal droppings (Manchester, England). ... Connecticut state Rep. Kevin Ryan, sentenced to four months' hard time for repeated DUI convictions, said he can very well conduct his legislative business from his cell and does not intend to resign.
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