ARIES (March 21-April 19) When the Red Hot Chili Peppers released their fifth album, Blood Sugar Sex Magick, in 1991, it blasted them into stardom. They appeared in large arenas, won a Grammy, had a hit song at the top of the charts and sold millions of records. Guitarist John Frusciante freaked out. As an artist loyal to the underground sensibility, he was embarrassed to be in a band that had mainstream popularity. In the middle of a tour, he quit. You may have to deal with a comparable development in 2008. Will you opt to remain low-profile, as Frusciante did, or will you answer the invitation to get more professional?
TAURUS (April 20-May 20) When China’s Three Gorges Dam becomes fully operational in 2009, the hydroelectric power it generates will provide renewable energy to a sizable portion of the population. As a replacement for coal consumption, it will also eliminate 100 million tons of greenhouse gases. That’s the good news. The bad news is that it will require a thousand towns and villages to be permanently flooded, forcing over a million people to leave their homes. You may be faced with a comparable option in 2008. If you’re willing to deal with displacement, you will gain access to tremendous reserves of pure mojo.
GEMINI (May 21-June 20) Would you like to own a 60-inch flat-screen HDTV plasma television with surround-sound speakers? How about a $6,000 Daniel Hanson bathrobe made of silk-trimmed pashmina, a diamond-encrusted Cartier Luxury watch and a heated toilet seat? All of these wonders and more could be within your grasp in 2008. In my opinion, however, going after them would be a waste of your substantial acquisitive potential, which would be better used in pursuit of tools and training that will help you upgrade your skills and refine the unique gifts you have to give the world.
CANCER (June 21-July 22) For millennia, human beings have sought and received help from spiritual beings who are imperceptible to the senses. It’s unfortunate that modern Western culture, still in the chokehold of the materialist delusion, makes it challenging for anyone alive today to tap into the supernatural blessings that so many of our forebears enjoyed. But I believe you will be able to overcome this disadvantage in 2008. There’s a good chance you will figure out what it takes to establish direct communion with a spiritual ally.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22) Picture a full-grown lion with a thin string tied around one of its back legs. The other end of the string is tethered to a wooden stake lodged in the dirt. The lion seems to think it’s held captive, and never tries to escape. It’s restless and frustrated, periodically emitting a doleful sound that’s both a pained growl and a mournful whine. I want you to think of this scene at least once a month in 2008. Each time, ask yourself, “Am I that lion?” Make sure you always know that you can snap the string with ease and bound away to freedom.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) The desert-dwelling creosote bush can survive for centuries on little water. In the Mojave Desert there is a ring of creosote, named “King Clone,” whose age has been carbon-dated at 11,700 years. This low-maintenance wonder reminds me of you. You sometimes entertain the fantasy that the less you need, the stronger you’ll be. The downside of this attitude is that you may unwittingly make it hard for people to give you gifts. The upside is that you’ve learned how to nurture and take care of yourself. But in 2008, I foresee you making a shift away from the creosote bush metaphor. You’re more likely to resemble a tomato bush that gets watered regularly.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22) Lake Vostok is as big as Lake Ontario, but no one on earth knew about it until 1996. Scientists who had been drilling through Antarctica’s thick sheets of ice discovered it two miles below the surface. Here’s what they were able to find out about the ancient lake: Hermetically sealed off for at least a half million years, it gets no sunlight, has an average temperature below zero, and may harbor life forms as exotic as those on other planets. And yes, it’s in a liquid state, for reasons you can read about here: tinyurl.com/2lq79d. All that is prelude to the following announcement: Lake Vostok will be one of your prime metaphors in 2008. I predict you will dig deep to discover an ancient, pristine mystery at the bottom of your life. You should explore it thoroughly, driven by both an innocent sense of wonder and a robust analytical curiosity.
SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21) You’re pretty smart, but would you like to become even smarter in 2008? It’s quite possible that you will get more skilled at managing and solving your personal problems. You may also become a better judge of character and develop a brilliant knack for knowing what’s good for you. There’s one main thing you have to do in order to ensure that you will fully activate these potentials: Become more generous. Here’s your thought for the year, courtesy of Eleanor Roosevelt: “The giving of love is an education it itself.”
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) The number of millionaires on the planet increased more than 9 percent last year. Judging from the astrological omens, I’m betting that the growth rate in the coming year will be similar. A disproportionately large amount of the newly wealthy in 2008, however, will be Sagittarians. And even those of you who don’t make it to a million will probably get richer quicker than you have in more than a decade – especially if you make that your intention.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) The Greek philosopher Aristotle said that when new facts and ideas emerge, we should be willing to coin fresh words to convey the unfamiliar information. Do you agree? If so, be ready to dream up a steady stream of new terms in 2008. I bet you’ll encounter more novelty than you have since 1996. Dead language and stale clichés won’t be sufficient to wrestle the meaning out of your unprecedented experiences. To jumpstart your receptivity to made-up words, try this one: freakomancy. It refers to the art of divining the future by noticing the most unusual and anomalous elements present in any given situation.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18) One of the planet’s highest active volcanoes is Mount Cotopaxi in Ecuador. It also happens to be the site of the world’s only equatorial glacier. Please visit this complex place sometime in 2008. If that’s not possible, at least promise me that you will vividly imagine yourself there. Why? Because in order to bring out the best in yourself in the coming months, I think you will need to be fueled by a visceral sense of what it’s like when primal opposites co-exist.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20) When I first learned about Jupiter in grade school, my science textbook said the planet had 12 moons. Years later, thanks to better telescopes and data returned by America’s Voyager spacecrafts, we know that at least 63 moons are orbiting the solar system’s largest planet. I expect an equally dramatic expansion will unfold for you in 2008. At this time next year, your social network should be much bigger than it is now. You may even be at the center of a Jovian-style web of firstname.lastname@example.org
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