Opening this week
Central Intelligence Believe it or not, my mother is fascinated by Kevin Hart. I mean, the woman is 85 years old and whiter than Casper, but when she hears that rat-a-tat delivery issuing from the TV, she comes running like Pavlov's dog in the presence of a Quarter Pounder. I've seen her watch three of Hart's stand-up specials in a row, which is my definition of crossover success. But I'm not sure even Ma Schneid is going to be able to work up all that much excitement for Central Intelligence, a buddy picture that teams Hart with Dwayne Johnson. The idea is that they went to high school together, but in the ensuing years, they've completely traded places in society. You mean Johnson used to be a black guy? No, he was the ostracized nerd to Hart's big man on campus – but now Johnson is an insanely capable CIA agent whose toughness is only reinforced when he has to team up with the considerably meeker Hart for an important mission. Nope, not a lot of promise in that threadbare setup – unless you know somebody whose mom is still crushing on the Scorpion King. (PG-13)
Finding Dory There's a time-tested rule that, the longer you have to wait for a sequel, the likelier the picture will suck (there's a reason Godfather 3 is best remembered as a punch line on The Sopranos) and/or bomb at the box office (did you know there was actually a My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2? Yep, that was a thing that happened). It's safe to say that most of the known world is hoping for an exception in Finding Dory, the long-awaited follow-up to 2003's Finding Nemo. Thirteen years later – or, as Dory would perceive it, in the wink of an eye – our adorably forgetful Blue Tang heads out on a quest to find her family. Wait a minute, you interject: Dory has a family? Oh, absolutely; surely you've heard of the Blue Tang Clan. Nyuk nyuk. In an inspired bit of casting, her father and mother are voiced by, respectively, Eugene Levy and Diane Keaton. Yeah, I totally see Annie Hall as the source of Dory's DNA. I'm just trying to forget that Keaton was in Godfather 3. (PG) ALSO PLAYING
Puerto Ricans in Paris Hey, why should Jay-Z and Kanye West have all the fun? (Come to think of it, why should they have ANY of the fun?) Pitbull was the executive producer of this dramedy, in which Luis Guzman and Edgar Garcia play NYC cops whose dogged pursuit of Louis Vuitton bootleggers takes them all the way to the City of Lights. Amazingly, the movie distribution industry did not see widespread commercial potential in the concept "Canal Street Devil Wears Prada for the Hispanic audience," dumping the movie instead in a limited, largely unheralded release. "Mild amusement," gushes Variety! (R)
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