Hey, Alan Grayson … 
Would you guys like to know WHY we rescinded our endorsement of The Incredible Sulk?
Well, here goes: A few minutes after Billy published his story on the District 8 congressional candidates - a fairly even-handed piece, in my estimation - Alan Grayson went ape-shit on him. Never mind that we'd just endorsed him in Happytown™, or that Billy's section on Grayson was mostly complimentary.
Grayson was pissed - FUCKING PISSED - because we quoted Quoc Van (incorrectly, it seems - and we promised a correction) saying he was the only candidate who qualified by petition (yeah, big deal, right?) and that we called him a "millionaire" and "Washington, D.C." lawyer, which he objected to because he has a law office in the DC area and is in fact a millionaire but thinks it makes him look bad and it's our job to help him out, or something.
After the jump, you'll get the entire email exchange between Alan and Billy, in which Alan accuses us of trying to get his family hurt by saying he's a millionaire. (Editor's note: Grayson sez he was kidding about that. Ha Ha.)
Oh Alan, BTW, when YOU, as a congressional candidate, EMAIL A NEWSPAPER, your conversation is not OFF THE RECORD.
8/20/08 7:46 PM
Dear Billy: This is off the record. This is not for your letters to the editor column, or your on-line article comments. First, Quoc Van is not the only FL-8 candidate to qualify by petition. I qualified by petition, which you probably can confirm on-line. In fact, we got a lot more petitions than Quoc did. We got the 4300 that we needed to qualify, and we got another 4300. Second, "millionaire Washington, DC attorney" is not appropriate. Even the Sentinel has stopped whipping that dog. I moved here in 1996. So cut it out.
Please make appropriate changes in the on-line version of the article.
Sincerely,
Alan
---
Alan,
Thanks for the correction. I did contact your campaign about the petition/qualifying fee, and they weren’t sure. Also, the state elections site was down most of the time I was composing the piece (and was again last night when I got your letter). I erroneously went on Van’s word there. Anyway, I apologize and the correction will be made.
As for the second item, despite your rousing “cut it out,” I think your argument is one of semantics. Your present ad depicts you as a powerful attorney in Washington, and the Vanity Fair piece just came out in December stating the same. There is nothing in that statement that implies that you do not reside here.
You’ll also notice that you were endorsed in the front of the book by the Weekly. Enjoy. Have a nice day.
Billy Manes
--
Dear Billy: Still off the record. You can correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't think that the present ad or the Vanity Fair piece refers to me as a powerful attorney in Washington in any way, shape or form. On the contrary, the Vanity Fair piece opens with a long discussion of our life here in Orlando. Both our contractor fraud cases and our lawyers are all over the country, because we normally have to file the cases where the defendant is located. We actually have only one case, out of dozens, that we are litigating in Washington.
The problem with calling me a "millionaire Washington, DC" attorney is that it creates a false impression. Someone who is reading that phrase might naturally conclude that I spend a lot of time there, when I don't, and I haven't. In fact, last year, I spent more time in Africa than I did in Washington, DC, and last year wasn't unusual. Please rethink this. It's misleading, and it's unfair to me.
I'm not too thrilled with "millionaire," either, but at least that's accurate. If our home is burglarized or our children kidnapped, of course, then I'll blame you for that. Thanks for the endorsement.
Sincerely,
Alan
---
I called your [law firm's] Virginia office this morning to make certain that you were still there. The phone was answered with your name included. That is where you are headquartered, right? Your website says so. I understand your argument, but in my opinion -- as in those of my superiors -- the statement is not erroneous or misleading. As for the finances, I do recall your discussion of your Fortune 500 concerns in our meeting. Obviously, I am not out to harm your family. Thanks.
Billy
---
Dear Billy: Still off the record. I have spent a grand total of less than eight hours in the Virginia office this year. There are three attorneys in that office whom I have never met. There are two others whom I have met twice, briefly. It should come as no surprise that when the law firm phone is answered, the receptionist gives my name, as part of the firm name. I own the firm, so my name is part of the firm name. So what? There are dead people whose names are part of law firm names. It means nothing. To say that I am "still there" is to stretch the meaning of the word "there" beyond any recognition. If I'm almost never there, then how can I be "still there"?
>
> Seriously, saying that I am a Washington DC attorney is a disservice to me and your readers. It would be way more true to refer to Ric Keller as "Washington, DC Congressman," because that's where he lives. That's not where I live. I've learned to accept all the cutesiness and snarkiness, but I still expect a certain degree of accuracy about the facts.
>
> Sincerely,
> Alan
--
Dear Alan,
For the record, "off-the-record" implies a mutual agreement that was never reached in this email exchange. While I'll abide by the gentleman's agreement that we made during our face to face interview in which you repeatedly chose to go off the record, your emails are a separate issue. You are, in fact, emailing a newspaper, whether you choose to view us as one or not. Thank you.
Billy
__
We're anxiously awaiting Alan's response. Remember kids, vote for someone else.
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