... that this is going to be a lean Christmas, the Winter Park Boat Parade, viewable for the past four years from the Albin Polasek Museum, has been cancelled.
According to a release from the city, "there was a lack of financial resources and volunteers needed to host the event." They are already recruiting for volunteers for next year's attempt. (If you're interested in saving Christmas, call Debbie Komanski at 407-647-6294.)
Thanks a lot, recession. Now we don't get pretty lights on the water. This isn't shaping up to be a very happy birthday for Jesus.
Folks, you probably know about the big game this weekend - the annual dust-up between the Bethune-Cookman Wildcats and the Florida A&M, let's say, Grain Silos. But you may not know about some of the side shows to the spectacle (because some calendar editor didn't do his homework, but this isn't about finger pointing).
Fans of involuntary diaphragm spasms (not counting the hiccups) might enjoy Laugh Out Loud Classic Comedy Edition. Steffon Von, Ken Miller and Rahn Man, the flyer-proclaimed three Florida Kings of Comedy, inject some much needed levity into this all too serious rivalry. And there's music from Tyesha Williams. And a portion of the proceeds benefit "Central Florida families in the memory of Anne Browne Payne." So all in all a good thing.
It's Friday at the Sheraton Orlando Downtown Hotel, 60 S. Ivanhoe Blvd. Tickets are $10 in advance and $15 at the door. There was a 7 p.m. show that sold out, so you're probably going at 9 p.m.
Also that night is Hughey's Classic Old Skool Party. If you're old skool enough, you should know how that goes down. If not, the flyer includes a "for mature adults only" warning. Friday, 10 p.m., Hughey's American Grill, 260 Douglas Ave., Altamonte Springs, 321-972-5972, no cover, good times, get out there.
And if you aren't schizophrenic enough on Friday, there's also the Battle of the Bands at the Amway Arena. Tickets to that are between $15-$25 through Ticketmaster.
And then, to help repent for everything that goes down all weekend, Hughey's is also hosting a Gospel Soul Food Brunch on Sunday at 2 p.m. and 6 p.m.
Post on here if you know of anything else around town that might be too risque to list. Rock out, crazy people. Go Grain Silos!
You ever hear those stories about how Hitler only had one testicle. Turns out, it was true. (This prompted the headline in the London Telegraph: "Nazi leader Hitler really did have only one ball.")
Apparently, it was shot off during WWI. The doctor who saved his life back then wound up regretting it the rest of his life. That seems like quite the burden to bear.
But, but … I thought he was a half-breed Muslim surrender monkey who palled around with unrepentant terrorists and was going to turn the Homeland Security Dept. over to Bill Ayers or Hamas or something.
Guess not.
The message appeared chiefly aimed at persuading Muslims and Arabs that Obama does not represent a change in U.S. policies. Ayman al-Zawahri said in the message, which appeared on militant Web sites, that Obama is "the direct opposite of honorable black Americans" like Malcolm X, the 1960s African-American rights leader.
In al-Qaida's first response to Obama's victory, al-Zawahri also called the president-elect — along with secretaries of state Colin Powell and Condoleezza Rice — "house Negroes."
This Qaeda douche went on to say that Obama would be a tool of Israel, which should come as news to all the right-wingers who thought he was going to turn the Holy Land over to bin Laden two seconds after he was sworn in on the Qu'ran.
On an unrelated note, we'll have our own story about Mormons - and their Deseret Ranch property - out next week.
Dan Savage, the guy who writes Savage Love, is going full-bore after the Church of Latter-Day Saints.
Really, there's nothing I'd love to see more than Darth Vader frog-marched to some "undisclosed location" inside a federal penitentiary somewhere in the middle of Kansas or wherever for the rest of his days, on account of, well, being an evil son of a bitch. Still, I'm not quite taking seriously this report that he was indicted by a grand jury in some Texas County I've never heard of. Besides, this one has nothing to do with Iraq, or Gitmo, or those secret energy meetings; it's about some prison company or something.
I, like everyone else who grew up in the 80s and came of age in the 90s, had a Nintendo. Because my folks weren't big on me playing video games, I was always a few generations of gaming machines behind my peers. They had Super Nintendo, and whatever the hell came after that, and I still had the original - including the original, come-with-the-machine games Duck Hunt and, of course, Super Mario Bros. (For the record, I made it to the final level, but never actually beat that demon thing. I was always terrible at Duck Hunt. Some of us weren't made to shoot things, real or imagined.)
Anyway. There was no better way to kill an afternoon and some brain cells that to hit the bong a little - sorry, Mom - and try to convince Mario or Luigi to successfully dodge those stupid canons and little critters en route to jumping the flag pole at the end of every round. It was fun.
But if you ever wanted to be Mario, and jump from brick to brick and bang your head into little boxes that would spit out those blessed gold coins of life, rather than just imagining yourself as him on the idiot box, some dudes from New York would like to give you that opportunity. See it after the jump.
read the full post here.
SHOWS THROUGH SUNDAY AT AMWAY ARENA!
The Orlando area already has more than its share of dinosaurs. They have featured roles in two of Disney’s parks, one of Universal’s and an entire ghetto-tastic tourist trap of their own off I-4 on the way to Tampa. My girlfriend insists that the giant reptiles never went extinct at all, but merely wait in woods, ready to re-emerge and retake Florida at a moment’s notice. I always laughed off her semi-serious speculation, but not anymore. After seeing Walking With Dinosaurs: The Live Experience at the Amway Arena Wednesday night, I’m a true believer. These lizards are alive!
read the full post here.
So, of interest to myself and perhaps the other two-dozen or so people in this burg that pay attention to Canadian television comedies, a bit of very sad news.
Trailer Park Boys, the answer to the question, "What would happen if we made a hybrid of The Office and The Sopranos, and set it in a Canadian trailer park?" has been cancelled. Like, for realz this time.
Season 7 ended more than a year ago, but recently, the internets were abuzz with rumors that there was going to be an eighth season, plus an hour-long special and a sequel to the theatrical feature Trailer Park Boys: The Big Dirty.
Well, Mike Clattenberg, the creator of the series, confirmed on Showcase's blog that there was no eighth season coming.
He did say that the hour-long special was real, and would be premiering on Dec. 7 of this year. He also mentioned that there was indeed a theatrical sequel set for release next December, tentatively entitled Trailer Park Boys - Countdown to Liquor Day.
So since I don't live in Canada, I'm going to have to fire up my bittorrent client on Dec. 8th. Hopefully the new feature will get something like an American theatrical release, unlike The Big Dirty, that was screened only in New York and L.A., even though it was produced by Ivan Reitman. (Yeah, I'm a nerd. I watched a midnight screening at a theater in Times Square. Jealous? Thought so.)
And for you true fans, no, there was no mention of the supposed spin-off series, The Drunk and On Drugs Happy Fun Time Hour. It sounds too good to be true, but just imagine if it isn't.
Haven't caught a whiff of Trailer Park life yet? Check out this teaser clip from the new special, "Say Goodnight to the Bad Guys".
Oh wait, it just did.
The Anthonys fired their spokesman for making money off their tragedy. The Sentinel, absolutely blind to the irony, plastered the "story" all over its web site under the banner "SENTINEL EXCLUSIVE." The spokesman says someone's trying to frame him, which given how fucked up everything anywhere near this fucked-up situation is, seems entirely plausible and probably happened.
Please God, make it stop.
Someone needs to kick Anthony Kennedy in the nuts. The man's supposed to be our last swinger and he keeps swinging the wrong damn way. 5-4 on gun control. 5-4 on Gitmo. 5-4 on school diversity. According to CNN, one third of cases decided in the last term were done by a 5-4 vote, compared with only a quarter's worth of unanimous cases.
Add to that tally Winter v. Natural Resources Defense Council.
read the full post here.
you can't keep a good monkey down.
Anonymous said, "Remove the rat droppings, beard hair and "potential" for food poisoning it will be even better than ... "
Anonymous said, "IT'S OVER......... "
Anonymous said, "Hey BW above, you might as well stop waiting, the Fat lady has done sung her last song!... "
Anonymous said, "You will be lucky if all of you don't go to jail for participating in such a scam! I think thie PON... "
Anonymous said, "I heard about this thing I knew it was a scam from the moment i heard it think people think, think... "
Anonymous said, "Mark S.: are you as gullable and stupid as you sound like you are or are you just pretending to be ?... "
Anonymous said, "She buckled under the AG and the government...disappointing...!!!! PREMATURE????? Premature seizi... "
Billman said, "Unfortunately, that video has been removed from the site. :(... "
