Machine Gun America
is a real thing – it's an attraction that features all sorts of opportunities for you to shoot big, honking machine guns for fun and pleasure – and it's opening in Kissimmee this weekend. On Dec. 20, you can pretend to be a soldier and shoot military-grade firearms, because we guess the regular old kind you usually shoot are not big and loud enough. Or you can pretend to be running from zombies during a zombie apocalypse. Or you can live out your Wild West fantasy, with a shootout scenario that's Western-themed (did they even have machine guns in the Wild West?). You can also take part in the Big Screen Legends scenario, in which you get to relive your favorite movie scenes involving guns. No, not Bambi.
And judging from the photo above, you can also hang out in a lounge with lots of insane rifles on the walls. You'll have to be 13 years or older to get into Machine Gun America, and no alcohol will be sold on premises. No, you cannot bring your own guns or ammo because this isn't a firing range – it's an attraction. One that'll help you blow off some steam after waiting in line for the Seven Dwarves Mine Train for 110 minutes, or help drown out the tune of "Zip-A-Dee-Doo-Dah" that's been echoing in your head ever since your third trip down Splash Mountain with the kids.
Orlando: Come for the Legoland, stay for the machine guns.